The 10 signs you have poor boundaries actually go back to your childhood. Probably you didn’t receive the kind of love and acceptance or felt rejected for multiple reasons (as it goes in many desi households), and now that you’re an adult your worst fears have come alive. So, in order to protect your joy, you need to understand what healthy boundaries are and why you even need them.
Moreover, to understand what boundaries are not, let’s get into the 10 signs you have poor boundaries. The first step is to identify the cause, realize it and then positively working towards correcting it.
It cannot get clearer than this. You just simply hate letting people down which is why you try your best not to disappoint them no matter what the cost is.
AGREE WITH OTHERS TO KEEP THE PEACE
Even if you have opposing views, in order to keep the peace in order and semblance, you simply agree with others on everything.
BURN OUT
You feel burned out all the time because you exhaust yourself in playing the hero or saviour, however you want to put it as.
GUILT FOR SELF-CARE
You crave “me time”, but if it effects others, you feel guilty about having to take care of yourself which you would be spending on satiating others.
STRUGGLE WITH DECISION-MAKING
And you struggle a lot in making a decision because even though you want to keep your situation in mind, you also wonder what could be in the best interest of other people. So you find yourself neither here nor there.
TIME MANAGEMENT
You give your time to others like charity, leaving none for yourself or things that are important for your well-being.
FEEL TAKEN FOR GRANTED
It may hurt you, but by putting yourself out there for everyone around you, you are taken advantage all of the time in your relationships, friends circle or even at work.
RESPONSIBILITY OF EVERYONE’S HAPPINESS
You’re not a vending machine so you can’t fulfill everybody’s needs on the spot and take responsibility of their happiness. But you tend to feel this way because you like the satisfaction it gives you, however in the long run it does cost you!
AVOID SPEAKING UP
When you’re hurt you avoid speaking and bottle all the negative emotions and energy only to hurt yourself in this process.
YOU’RE SECRETLY A BIT ANNOYED 24/7
Of course you are on a certain level when no one is there for you to nurture and cherish you the way you do for them.
